Neo NutHouse
by KawaiiGameFreak
Summary: Living with 17 brothers and sisters can't be fun.But exposing their dirty little secrets,now THAT'S fun.CHAPTER 2 UP!ON HOLD!
1. Proluge

Corry7:Hi! If you're wondering where Lily is, allow me to explain. She plans to write in 4 sections on FF: Super Smash Brothers, Pokemon, Sonic the Hedgehog and Neopets, this means a different 'muse' or 'muses' for every section; Lily Hicary for Sonic, Sparky the Great for Pokemon, the Master Hand/Crazy Hand for Super Smash Brothers and me for Neopets. The authoress will also be changing her username from Lily-Echinda to KawaiiGameFreak! This is her first Neopets story (that won't be dis-continued) so go easy on her. Not my fault if it sucks. Enjoy!

THE NEO NUTHOUSE!

PROLOGE

NORMAL POV

"Where is that stupid camera? I left it here this morning." Shouted a very annoyed yellow male bori.

"How am I supposed to know Corry? You and everyone else here has too much junk." Responded an equally annoyed red female uni.

"Why do you need it anyways?" Questioned a rather perplexed female disco cybunny.

"It's for a neoschool project. I have to make a video of my family by Monday."

"In that case, if you want to finish it by then, you should start…three weeks ago." Chuckled an amused green male techo. Corry had always thought Lizzo was funny, that's what techos are supposed to be like. It was true, Corry had a big family, maybe even twenty odd brothers and sisters.

"Good idea, where's the time machine?" He responded lightheartedly.

"FOUND IT!" Cried the cybunny as she held up a slightly dusty video camera.

"Thanks DustBunny, now to start." He switched on the camera and pointed it to himself. "Hi, my name's Corry and this is my slightly insane and hugely huge family." The camera zoomed over to DustBunny. "This is DustBunny, the modern hippie and the only one painted." She did a peace sign and said "Groovy" in the best hippie sounding voice she could.

"That's not true! I'm painted!" Screeched another bori.

"Ok, sorry 'bout that." The camera paned over to a slightly ticked off looking ice bori. "This is my sister Kiki, the third youngest in the family."

"Let us in!" Shouted two blue shyrou (hey that rhymed).

"Us too!" Yelled a blue ruki, red ixi and red peophin.

"Don't forget us!" Hollered a red kougra, blue zafara, red scorchio and yellow poogle.

"Wait for us!" Cried a brown grundo, yellow shyrou and yellow flotsam. The enormous crowd gathered in a heap in front of the camera. Corry was in complete dismay, along with the rest of his family.

"Um…this is my family. They are… (in order of appearance)" He took a deep breath. "…Pegessa, DustBunny, Lizzo, Kiki, Sal and Sal-neo, Flick, Sinsi, Princessa, Toiny(pronounced Tony), Smarty, DragonChild, Racer, Ferlang, BabyDragonChild and last but not least, Flonder! Whew, that was a mouthful. We get along pretty well, except when Smarty goes out on Saturdays, Toiny swipes our stuff and BDC drinks before bed."

"HEY!" The above mentioned three shouted. The others just laughed.

"Not to mention between Pegessa, Princessa, DustBunny and Sal-neo, most of our inventory is grooming products."

"NOT TRUE!" The accused retorted.

"Most of the junk in here belongs to Sal and Racer."

"Sports equipment is NOT junk!"

"And the rest of us are insane, except me, the only normal one here."

"GET HIM!" The group of sixteen dog pilled Corry, leaving only his arm and head free.

"Thank Illusion for back plates." The now flattened bori muttered. "We'll that's my family for ya; loveable, yet out of control. If I get a low mark for this assignment, blame _them_." He motioned to the pile of neopets on top of him. "See ya." Corry shut off the camera. "Now to more pressing matters…KINDLY GET THE BLOODY HECK OFF OF ME!"

LATER ON THAT NIGHT

Corry sat alone in his room, board to tears and tired as hell. He would have been in bed hours ago if it weren't for two things; Sinsi, Flick and Smarty fighting over who's read more books and the 'assignment'. This wasn't a neoschool assignment, it was personal. "Bark, bark." Yapped Chester, Corry's puppyblew.

"Don't worry boy, I know what I'm doing." He reached to his desk and took out the first tape. Then he put in another and turned it on "Hey, me again, this is a brand new work I'm committing time to. This is my room." The camera paned across the cloud coated room pointing all the points of interest. The poster of Cyra, coconut lamp, Rebuild Maraqua poster, fresh bamboo bed, Brightvale flag, and other random things about the room were caught on tape. Corry lay on his back with the camera facing him. "This will be no ordinary home movie; this will be the mother of all home movies! This will show Neopia what life is _really _like, not like the lives of mega millionaires like featherally. This will go further into my family's personal life then ever before. I will show my family like you has never seen. This is…'Neo NutHouse'!"

"Shut up Corry! None of us can sleep with you talking into that stupid camera of yours!" Sal yelled from upstairs.

"Maybe if _you_ stop banging your soccer ball around we'd get some sleep." Her twin sister, Salneo hollered.

"If all of you could be so kind as to lower your voices and give us some _peace _and _quiet_, we would be very grateful." DustBunny requested calmly. She never cursed or said anything bad about her friends or family. Corry wondered who's life to take a look into first, then it dawned on him.

"DustBunny, the calmest, most peaceful of us all. Maybe we only _see_ her like this, maybe there's…a darker side to the cute and innocent. The first victim of the paparazzi is near, we are about to take a small step into my huge family. The following footage may not be suitable for children under the age of thirteen, so I'm warning you now, enter at your own risk."

"CORRY, SHUT OFF THAT DAMNED CAMREA!" Toiny shouted from his room, also upstairs.

"…let them sleep well tonight, we'll wait for the first light of daybreak to begin." With that, Corry shut off his camera and went to sleep.

Corry7:That was just the intro. All those neopets belong to KawaiGameFreak's different accounts on Neopets. You'll see more of their personalities in the next chapter. What did you think? This was her first attempt at third person writing, which is what the story's going to be in. Neomail her at knucklesfangirl (my home account), dragonchild911159 (BDC's and DC's home account) or blackdimind (Smarty's, Pegessa's, Lizzo's and Princessa's home account). She currently can't get into chaolover7 (Flick and Kiki's home account; frozen), hotey217 (Sal, Salneo, Flonder and Toiny's home account; lost password) and neopal20068 (DustBunny, Sinsi, Ferlang and Racer's home account; lost password). Enjoy the first chapter and the many more to come!


	2. Who Ordered Pizza?

Corry7:This is where the humor comes in(WARNING: The authoress will make good use of "Something Has Happened"-s. So prepare for "Anvils Falling from the Sky" randomness). This story may not be updated as much because the authoress is very busy updating "A Wish Come True?". Not to mention there's a new species of neopets coming out soon. Enjoy the next chapter!

Ch.1: Who Ordered Pizza?

Corry loved Saturdays. He'd spend all morning watching cartoons and the afternoon playing with Chester. The night was spent watching movies. But he had more important things to do tonight. Corry crept up to the door of DustBunny's room and started up the camera. "Every Saturday, someone orders a super meaty pizza and no one claims it. Maybe after her years of stuffing her face with tofu, she's finally cracked. Let's watch." He moved in a bit closer so he could see and hear what was going on. DustBunny was lying on her CATFB bed talking on her cell.

"I'd like to order a super meaty pizza with extra meat and sauce." She whispered "Put it on my tab."

"How-a come-a you never pay up front-a?" Asked the voice on the other end. He spoke in a strange Italian accent.

"I told you at least a thousand times Joe, my family thinks I'm a vegetarian, so I gotta put up this 'act' so they won't wise up. Just put it on my tab and bring it here ASAP." She hung up "Now to get ready." DustBunny hopped off the bed (no pun intended) and started toward the door. Corry ran like thunder around the corner and waited. He pointed the camera at himself.

"That was close. Why don't we head down to the lounge while we wait for some fun?" Corry shut off the camera and walked downstairs. The lounge was the best room in the house. It had a wide screen TV with surround sound, a state of the art PC with speakers the size of monitors and CD burner, an X-Box, PlayStation2, Game Cube and Dream Cast, DVD/CD player and it was exactly like Japan; a lot of people, little space. "Who here thinks they can beat me at Mario Kart?"

27 MINUTES LATER

"I can't believe BDC beat me at Mario Kart." Corry muttered, shutting off the Game Cube. The little yellow shoyru giggled with delight. He acted a lot like an infant, even thought he was older then Corry.

"Just cuz I'm small don't mean I can't beat you." He beamed smugly. All of a sudden the door bell rang. "Better get my camera." Corry thought as he quickly picked up the device and started it up.

"I'll get it!" DustBunny cried as she raced to the door. She opened it and standing there was a red ruki with a short beard holding a pizza box.

"Did anyone here order a super meaty pizza with extra sauce?" He asked in a dull tone. Everyone shrugged their shoulders. DustBunny let out a gasp.

"For shame! How could anyone kill poor helpless creatures just to get a meal? I'll be taking this to my room to cremate it." She snatched the pizza box from him.

"Aren't you going to pay for that?"

"The nerve of you! Paying you for this atrocity is like paying a hired gun for murder. Get away from this place before I call the humane society and have you arrested!"

"Whatever, look I'm just doing my job. See ya." He walked off grumbling something about hippie weirdoes and about how he should have got that job at Grundos.

"Why does she do this every Saturday night? It's embarrassing," Racer, a yellow poogle,muttered under his breath "and how can one pizza guy get the address wrong so many times?"

"That's what they think." Corry thought. He followed DustBunny as she walked upstairs holding the pizza box. She walked into her room and shut the door. Corry opened it just a crack to see. The room looked like a Disco Paintbrush exploded. Lava lamps, flower and peace patterns on the wall, multi colored carpet and a disco ball on the ceiling made the room step into a time machine and travel back to the summer of '69. DustBunny sat on the bed, stuffing her face with pizza and chanting.

"Oh Great Spirit of the meek (munch, chomp, gobble), forgive those who kill and (crunch, gnaw, BURP) destroy for unholy uses. I honor yee as many in this day and age do not. (belch, slurp) I shall honor thee!" She continued to chant and stuff her face. Not bad. She actually could convince anyone she was a vegetarian. To bad she did _too_ good a job. She finished off the last slice of pizza. She whipped her face and thought out loud "What am I going to do if they ask if I really did cremate the pizza?" Just then, Sloth came in through the window with his ray gun and zapped the pizza box.

"MWAHAHAHA!" The figure cackled evilly.

"Thanks, I needed a pile of ash."

"HAHA…wait, you _wanted_ me to zap that pizza box into a pile of ash?"

"Ya."

"…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I CAN'T BE A _USEFUL_ VILLIAN!" With that he jumped out the window. If you listened close enough you could hear him screaming "STOP THANKING MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (SPLAT)" And if you looked down you would see Sloth's cloak caught on a bush and him running down the street in his polka doted boxers.

"Thank you random events."

LATER THAT NIGHT

Corry sat in silence in his room and watched the footage he'd shot that evening. He continued taping. "That was just part one. If you thought this was funny, wait till you see the other fifteen or more. Now…who's next?"

"Where'd my red glittery brush go?" Pegessa hollered from the second floor. "TOINY, WHERE DID YOU PUT IT?"

"Why do you guys ALWAYS blame me when you misplace your stuff?" Toiny yelled from the floor above.

"BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS TAKE IT."

"Do not!"

"Do to!"

"Do not!"

"Do to!"

"Do not!"

"Toiny, seen by most as a thief, maybe there's more in the eye of the kogura then most see. We will soon find out."

Corry7:Sorry if the authoress traumatized anyone due to the Sloth scene. The next chapter may be a two part chapter; it depends on how many reviews this story gets. C ya!


	3. Just a Theif?

Corry7:Hi ladies and gents! Before we start this new episode, I'd like you to meet someone. My little bro, Nar101 the red Hissi! Come on out Nar.

Nar101:(sheepishly)Hi.

Corry:Nar's gonna be in the next chapter, or the chapter after that; it depends on if the authoress actually starts studying for final exams. Let's get started!

Nar:Didn't you forget something?

Corry:Thanks bro, the authoress doesn't own Neopets™, Adam and Donna own Neopets™. She's just using us as an excuse not to study. Start the chapter!

Ch2:Just a Thief?

The day was long and dull; which is what most people expect of a Sunday. It was too hot to do anything except go swimming or eat ice cream. Normally summer was full of parties and fun, especially June. June was filled with wonderful and bizarre things; like the 'project' Corry was working on.

"Since it's too hot to do anything during the day, most do what they need to do at dark. This is the same for thieves." Corry slunk around the back of an old deserted building. It was mostly gray with blue curtains hanging from open windows. A dim light glowed from within. "Buildings like this are usually seen on Krawk Island, not Neopia Central. Let's see what their up to." The curious bori poked his camera through one of the windows. Inside, he saw what looked like an old fashion tavern. Pool, poker and backgammon tables as far as the eye could see. Fine looking waitresses picking up tabs and not so fine looking drunks playing roulette. At a table far off in the back was a small group of thieves known as the Swindling Six, one of the members being Toiny. Along with a korbat, an ixi, two draiks and a zafara, the six thieves, there was a leader who made them do all the dirty work while she swam in a pool of stolen gold. Her name was Maria, a feisty darigin kougra who was made known by her red bandana; worn as a symbol of authority amongst pilferers. Toiny wore a bandana just like it. "This may be my most cunning adventure yet. I must be careful, just waltzing into a place like the Dry Iceberg is bad enough, with a video camera is just asking for a death sentence. How do I proceed? They certainly won't welcome someone who fought on the heroes' side of every war." He thought long and hard. A sharp barking broke him from his thoughts. "Shhh, Chester, do you know what kind of trouble I could get in if they catch me here? Wait a minute…they know be, but they don't know you! Perfect, just hold still a second." Chester sat as Corry strung the camera on the puppyblew's back. "Now go all the way to the back table and get what you can on tape, just don't get caught. Ready boy?" He barked happily as he raced into the tavern. "I'm toast."

Inside the tavern, it was mayhem! About three stelths got in a fist fight and people started betting on the winner. After the fight, which was a three way tie; everyone wanted their money back, so yet another fist fight started up. Chester scurried behind a chair and waited. "We had a mighty good haul last time." Maria spoke "Good work, but next time…DON'T STOP IN THE MIDDLE OF A BANK ROBERY AND GO FOR DOHNUTS!" The whole tavern stopped. "Hehehe…WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT?" Everyone went back to business as usual. "Listen carefully; our next stealing gig is at Smugglers Cove and…"

"Smugglers Cove? Are you insane?" Exclaimed Toiny "Do you know what kind of watchmen they have over there? We could get killed, or worse…sent to jail!"

"Shut up. Anymore outbursts like that and I'll tell." He shut up. "I know what those bozos are like, that's why I prepared this." She held up what looked like a map. She spread it over the table. "This is a map of Krawk Island. I made note of where the watchmen for the cove are. If we go here…then here…then over here, we can tunnel right under where those pirates keep their loot. It's completely foolproof!"

"Isn't that what you said about you last 16 plans?"

"Didn't I tell you to shut up? We move out tonight, understood?" The gang nodded. "Good, let's go while the night's young." They got up and walked out, with Chester on their tail. The pup turned around to the side of the building.

"Good boy Chester. What'd ya get?" Corry quickly looked over the tape. "Well well well, looks like Toiny's got a secret, but how am I gonna get to Krawk Island?"

A SHORT WHILE LATER

The thieves slowly made their way underground. "Ow, watch it! Who shoved me?"

"Shut up!" Maria hissed "Or we'll get caught. Follow me." They had planed to dig a tunnel to Smuggler's Cove from the local tavern. What they didn't know was that a certain bori was right above them.

"I still can't believe that transport ship let us abroad." Chester listened to their movements and followed. "Wait, I have an idea." The duo walked to the local tavern and found one of the watchmen for the cove on break.

"Well wadaya know, some petty thieves think they can rob the cove blind? I'll see to it they be thrown in the brig." He was about to walk out but Corry stopped him.

"I have a better idea." The adventurous bori whispered his plan to the gral.

"Harharhar, that'll teach um a thing or two. Better get started."

"We have to be getting close to the cove by now." The group of swindlers kept digging until Maria stopped them. "Quiet, I hear voices." They listened.

"Hear about those bandits trying to tunnel their way to Smuggler's Cove?" One voice questioned.

"Must be a load of idiots, if they really wanted to get some loot, why don't they just turn left at the petpet store and keep going about a mile and a half? Heard there's a hoard of gold and sliver a thousand times bigger then the one at Smuggler's Cove." The second voice responded.

"Did you hear that? Turn around men, we're heading to the really treasure!"

A WHILE LATER

"We've been digging for an hour. Can't we stop for…"

"No, we are not stopping for donuts, besides, we're here! Dig up."

"How can we dig up?"

"Haven't I told you a thousand times Toiny to shut up? Just poke your shovels at the top until it caves."

"Won't it cave in on us too?"

"JUST DIG!" The crew did as was told. They poked for 15 minutes until the roof started to crack. "This is it! This is your big beak! The Swindling Six will get their well deserved place in the history books!" The ground above them sagged and sagged until…a toilet fell on them. "What the hell? Look up and see what just happened." Toiny reluctantly went up.

"What happened was we dug under the local tavern."

"WHAT?"

"Weird, I know, but the worst is yet to come."

"Why is that?" Maria along with the other 5 crawled up out of the hole. They were surrounded by pissed off looking girls.

"We're in the ladies room."

OUTSIDE THE TAVERN

Sounds of fist fights, women's screams and guys yelling "How were we supposed to know?" filled the air, and Corry caught all the sights and sounds on tape from a window. "This has to be the best footage I've gotten all night. Thanks buddy."

"No problem, those guys are a constant pain in the rear."

"Ok, but I gotta ask you two questions; one, what was that secret Maria was talking about?"

"You don't know? It's that Toiny's won the regional dance contest 6 years running." Corry nearly went off his head laughing.

"K, and how did you know the way to tunnel under the girls washroom?" He stood there.

"Well um…you see…" He pretended to look at his watch. "Oh my, would you look at the time, gettin' awful late. You best be runnin' home now bye." He ran off at light speed. Corry just chuckled.

"This will catch so much on N-bay."

Corry:Hi, just to clear things up, N-bay is like E-bay except it's for Neopia. I may not be around cuz a war just started so I'll be fighting a lot. Enjoy and remember…FIGHT FOR MARAQUA!


End file.
